Friends? Sisters?11:40 PM
Wednesday, September 28, 2016
There's a quote which says "In your twenties, friends will come and go. Only then, you will know who your true friends really are". And i strongly believe in the quote right now.
On my first day of work as a nurse, i met her in the disposal room in the ward. We introduced ourselves and began clicking well with each other. We had breaks together, went out together during off days, vent our worries and shared our happiness with one another. We were sisters without the same mother. I always believed that she deserve a better half because her previous relationship had caused her so much hurt. When this guy, who is her boyfriend came along, he started causing conflicts between us, always making her chose between him and me..
And the day comes when a secret of her which i didn't know of threaten her job in the hospital. I didn't judge her for that secret but i stayed by her side, advised her and comforted her. I promised to keep the secret a secret from our fellow colleagues. But i couldn't spent much time with her because i was stuck with work too. Days passed, weeks passed. While waiting for the decision from the hospital, colleagues in the ward was always asking me where is she, what happened to her. I always told them the same answer: family issues. that's why she had to take no paid leave. Ward managers are always asking me to their office to ask me how was she and all.
One day, i was told by my other colleagues that they knew about the secret, her secret. I was shocked! How did they know about it? And it wasn't just this hospital but another hospital staffs knew about it too. The secret was just spreading like crazy. I wouldn't tell her that our fellow colleagues knew about the secret because i was afraid she would feel bad and embarrassed.
The next day, my nurse manager told me that she had submitted her resignation letter. I was shocked. I didn't know anything about it. She herself didn't let me know. In fact, she rarely texted me anymore. I didn't know how was she, how was she doing. She was just pushing me away and deleting me from her life. So, i texted her and asked her why didn't she told me anything. I was heartbroken. Instead, she just replied that she didn't want me to be sad after knowing that she is resigning.
How was i supposed to react to this? I was feeling very stress all these while because i had such a huge secret to keep and i couldn't share my thoughts with anyone. Every day at work, people around me kept asking me where was she and why isn't she working. Nurse managers asking me how was she and if i am trying to talk sense into her. After everything that happens, she just pushes me away and not letting me know that she is resigning? Sometimes i really wonder, did she even feel how i would feel? My face are also in the photos and yet, i have to act like it's okay and still comfort you. You didn't even feel a sense of remorse. All she did was just to be worried about herself.
My real sister was performing in this year NDP. We had 4 tickets and we offered you one to watch with us. My dad offered to drive you there and sent you home. You told your mum that you will be with my family and me. While my sister segment was still ongoing, you were packing up. Once her segment ended, you told me you needed to leave because your boyfriend was picking you up and you didn't want him to wait. It will be hard to leave once NDP is over as everyone will be leaving at the same time. I went home with my family after that and went to bed early because i was on morning shift the next day. 2plus in the morning, my phone suddenly rang. It was an unknown number but i woke up and picked it up. In my half sleep state, your mother was talking to me on the phone. She was looking for you and had no idea where you were. She wouldn't get you on your phone and she started asking me where were you and didn't my dad drove you home? Why aren't you home. After the call, i tried calling you a few times but your phone was off. I texted you to text me back. You called me a little later, almost 3am, telling me that you are out watching a movie. Hello, you are a mother with a son. Shouldn't you have more responsibility to just let your mother know where you are heading too? Do you really think that your mother will believe you that the NDP ends so late?! Some things are just common sense..
Up till today, i am still angry and disappointed with her. We were such close friends, sisters but yet, her actions made me really disappointed. I am glad you started your new life for now and i wish you all the best. Maybe time will heal the pain you caused to me and maybe one day, we will be close friends once more. But for now, i really really doubt it will happened. You choose to push me and your friends away and seek comfort in your boyfriend. I truly hope that he is the right guy for you and you will never regret your actions.
Like i said before, the internet has everything a guy needs for comfort in his own personal time. If a guy truly loves you, he will never make you do things that are morally wrong. It pains me to say this but if ever the same incident happens again in 7 years time, no one is going to pity you or be by your side because you choose to allow it to happen again.
Ending with a quote which makes such a good conclusion to my blog post. "Don't feel sad over someone who gave up on you, feel sorry for them because they gave up on someone who would have never given up on them."
